"It's only through writing that I've ever been able to suppress life's personal disappointments. When I can't write I feel anxious and out of sorts and am easily riled, though I'm usually able to control my emotions..."
- Pramoedya Ananta Toer (The Mute's Soliloquy: A Memoir)
["Hanya dengan menulis aku mampu menekan segala kekecewaan peribadi hidup. Bila aku tidak menulis, aku merasa cemas & tidak keruan serta mudah gusar, walau selalunya aku bisa mengawal emosiku..."]

Thursday, April 22, 2010

TOKIO HOTEL: SPESEL UNTUK UTOPIANZ!

24 jam notis untuk menyiapkan keempat-empat ahli band TOKIO HOTEL kepada karakter lakaran komik saya. Peh! Pagi nanti (23hb. April 2010) kena submit kepada Editor UTOPIA™. Insya-Allah!

Tom Kaulitz (kiri) & Bill Kaulitz


Gustav Schäfer (kiri) & Georg Listing

SIAP DI WARNA!

Saya telah pecah rekod peribadi mengilustrasi 4 karakter paling pantas, hanya dalam masa 2 hari jer (termasuk tidur, layan TV, layan kengkawan di opis, makan roti, sengal di hujung perlumbaan & sengal menunggu data saving)! Alhamdulillah... siap sudah karakter komik TOKIO HOTEL untuk majalah UTOPIA™. Nantikan kehadiran diorang dalam isu 178 (15hb. Mei 2010) & di Malaysia di bulan Mei 2010 nanti!




Tuesday, April 20, 2010

PEMAIN vs PECINTA: KARYA SEHARI!

Pada hari Sabtu (17hb. April 2010) & hari Ahad (18hb. April 2010), saya menghabiskan masa duduk di rumah menguruskan persediaan untuk memulakan kerjaya freelance sebagai penulis/pelukis komik pada pertengahan Jun 2010 nanti. Hari Sabtu banyak melayan problem internet yang menyakitkan hati (sampai terpaksa buang anti-virus yang menyusahkan loading!). Hari Ahad tepat jam 1 tengahari (sebelum Zohor) saya terus melakar sebuah cerita playboy berjudul 'PEMAIN vs PECINTA'. Alhamdulillah... sehingga jam 10 malam, saya berjaya menyiapkan pencilling cerita lengkap 6 m/s (maklum ler diselang-selikan lagi dengan solat, rileks sat layan TV & buat artikel pasal industri). Akhirnya saya dapat kembali seperti mana saya dahulu sebelum bertapak di dalam Industri Komik Malaysia. Semoga selepas ini hidup saya kembali tenang dalam dunia komik saya sendiri (no players interruption please!)... Yeaaaa!



Semalam pas balik daripada opis dapat layan inking part tu jer sebab sahabat handai daripada Sg. Buloh datang belanja makan malam (dia buat sendiri tuuu!) Spaghetti Bolognaise (yummmyyyy!). Alhamdulillah! Trimas sahabat²-ku... pasni Ayour nak makan Pasta Carbonara lak. Bleh? Tapi tunggu siap inking semua komik ni dululah ek. Hehe... ^_^


Sunday, April 11, 2010

MACAM BARU SEMALAM JER...


Bila terjumpa keratan artikel ni masa kemas² fail artwork kat umah, rasa macam tak percaya lak saya masih di sini selepas hampir 10 tahun dalam Industri Komik Malaysia. Malah paling enigma bila rasa cam baru jer nak mulakan karier dalam bidang komik ni... insya-Allah, mungkin sudah tiba masanya tumpukan kerjaya sebagai artis komik lak!

PANTUN KHAS BUAT 'PEMANTUN TERBAIK DAERAH MUAR TAHUN 1992'



Kalaulah pahit tolonglah makan
Hasrat pujian saya cungkilkan

Kalau tembaga cacat tokekan
Warkah ini kan patik mulakan

Gaya berhias beriring telolan
Pantun berjulang di pucuk kayangan
Madah berhelah mengusap nukilan
Membawa erti pada pandangan

Tidak ku kenal tidak ku rapat
Tapi hati pekulun terasa rapat

Minda ku hambar hati ku nista
Termampir saudara jatuh di sela
Antara bertiga penebat beta
Ternyata tuan hamba terlebih segala

Mata ku pusar telinga ku kangkang
Bacalah lagi ada di belakang
[rangkap ni merujuk kepada material asal di atas kertas kajang]

Jauhari membuat permata sebebat
Persembah kepada Puteri Malikat
Saudara menjual berkias hebat
Kerana itu ku sudi mendekat

Wajah jelita tersalah intai
Tersilap langkah tersingkap sari
Sayang tersumpah nenek kebayan
Bila peterena terlepa tirai
Laku mu tersuih di sanubari
Hatta ku kait pantun tanda ingatan

Ayam berkokok berubah laku
Melihat subuh tidak ke pagi
Tamatlah sudah sembah hormat ku
Tidak ku tahan menyambung lagi

Cuma gurauan tidak lupa diri
Memohon maaf sepuluh jari

Jatuhnya pinang di dalam ragi
Telepak sirih lepak di junjung
Kalau di izin Allah berjumpa lagi
Mohon sembahkan hai... pemantun ku sanjung

Nota: Saya tak ingat siapa 'Pemantun Terbaik Daerah Muar 1992' yang bernama Mohd. Hazli ni. Tetapi daripada nota pantun yang saya hasilkan ni jelas saya mengagumi karismanya berpantun. Dari catatan saya ketika masih di Tingkatan 5 ni, Mohd. Hazli berasal dari perkampungan Panchor, Muar & menuntut di Sek. Men. Sains Muar dalam aliran sains sosial (saya ketika itu menuntut aliran sains di Sek. Men. Sultan Allaudin Riayat Shah 1 Pagoh). Brader ni rupanya pernah menjuarai gelaran yang sama pada tahun 1991. Pelajar cemerlang SPM Pangkat 1, dia melanjutkan pengajian di Sek. Men. Tun Perak sebelum mengikuti kursus guaman di Universiti Malaya.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

HOMICIDAL LOVE: A FAGGOT'S CONFESSION

WARNING: 18SG rated storyline.
NOTE: I almost forgot I wrote this story in 15 minutes for a purpose to test one of my fellow employee on his English creative grammar. Not really sure when but I guess more than 7 months ago? Found it while I was reworking on my freelance works filing system at home office. Enjoy reading it!




I went to the funeral. The funeral of my best friend who died of homicide. Everybody was there; his parent, siblings and related people... such as me. I cried. They cried. It was such a sad scene. Too sad to tell... as if the feeling faded away with the mourning. Before they buried him, I saw his face. I saw his face back at his home, when his father and a few relatives folded him with white cloth. That pale face. I saw the neck. Line of cut, a rounded his neck. Still red against his bloodless, pale skin.

What in the world happened? He was such a nice guy. A very soft one. I was at the scenery. My room, our room! The policemen were there. Everybody too. They looked scared. Me either. I saw the room covered with blood. The floor... the wall... splattered with red sticky blood. One of the students claimed he heard something weird coming from in our room. Another saw my friend's head laid on the bed. The body was left alone at a corner of the room. The detective took the reports. No weapon found. But the report claimed it must be an ax or big sharp item. But not a gun obviously! The head was severed from the body. What a ridiculous crime for a college teenager.

After the funeral I kept thinking of what had happened to him. What was it that someone might want to kill him? Was there something bad about him? For years... let say 10 years I had been with him, I never knew about his enemy. Is there any? The thought makes me feel cold. Maybe... I am next?! Who knows! The thought still prying my head. Yet I couldn't let it out. This is sick!

My murdered best friend... he was a man. A very cute man. Girlish kind of look, originally. Both genders love him; male and female. He had a girlfriend, Shelly. But he left her. Reason? He said the girl got to find a proper man. Not like him who wasted most of his time juggling around with funny stuff like games, comic books and drugs; Just like me. That was why we were best friend.

Then, a guy... 'non-straight' one came to him and took care of him. The guy, physically looked 'straight' to me. Older than us. About 3 years older. Well built. Handsome. At first we were all just friends. Met in club. Hung around. He brought us around with his metal blue Porsche. He said he came from a wealthy family. Got just a few friends and he hated those among his level (wealthy kids!), "Bug-ass!" he said. So he hung around with us. Usually every weekend. After that he kept fetching my best friend at college, without me! Left me aside for no reason. No hard feeling from me. But I was quite jealous though. He took my best friend!

One day, my best friend came to me and tell me a secret. That wealthy man was in love with him! And he used his money to seduce my best friend. He sucked my one and only best friend with his money! Though I know my best friend's financial difficulty, coming from a poor family. To survive in college, he had to do a few part-time jobs. The offer from that 'bastard wealthy-boy' would really be a savior for him to secure his study. But not to me. My friend was drugged by his money!

So they went on. Being together as a couple. Physically looking normal to everybody else. Normal as two guys hanging around together having boyish-fun on the street. But basically they were having a bullshit affair. In my heart, I cried for him. For my best friend. What in the world was that wealthy-boy thinking? He bought my best friend just to have someone stick around him? Stick up his ass man! Absurd!

As days went on I just be the best friend I've always been. But something changed. His attitude. His style. He was a crook to me before. But after being with that wealthy-boy, he was more of a Don Juan to me. Straighten his curly hair and lighten up his skin with those creams. What they called lightening cream (more like sticky shit to me!). What was he thinking?! Still a man but grooming?! Ouch! Out of that fucking bases dude! No more 'grunge' to settled with.

I asked what went wrong. Maybe change of mood or what?! He said he wanted to get clean. Yea... clean my ass! Then more trouble came by. Not only that wealthy-boy wanted to stick up his dick into him but more... ! Girls got heavily crushed on him. Non-straight boys (fucking faggots!) got on him too! Straight boys felt wanna screwed his ass to death. Jealousy took part but it ain't looked like a reason for homicidal thing. Yea... everybody was crazy for him. Such an attractive young man. Pretty face with such a slender manly figure.

Furthermore I was disturbed to know he hung around at those wondrous clubs. Faggots' club. I opposed to his act. He said don't worry. Life no matter for all these junks. Have fun with it. Get along. Feel free to taste everything and live life to the fullest. It did sound good to me. But in a way I just replied "Yea, then try taste Round-Up to your fullest. Maybe you will know how it breaks down your insides." But he smiled and acted like my words were just rhythmic lyrics that stringed on his ear. Then there was he, stoned again.

A year passed. We got to second semester of the final year. He was not bad. He got good grades. Me too. With his lifestyle compared to me, I should be ashamed. Even he was so busy fucking around with those faggots, babes and nightlife but he still can achieved the best in his study. But me... not much of ado only stick to the possibility.

He told me to stick with my vision as he was to his. Yeap! We both wanna go out there. Out of this nightmare college and live out there, find a job and be the best of human being. Get a life; a car, a house and a family. He said maybe this time (this college time), he went through a lot of pain. Survived the hard time of being a poor student by playing dirty games, even though he admitted he never liked it (minus the guilty pleasures!). After all this was over, he'd promise to leave it all behind. Yea... right! They were your words my friend. I believed it. As I believe it now.

But what is fate, we can never know. I never knew someone would want to kill him. Someone has the guts to kill him. Me myself can't afford to do so. Is it maybe because I'm his best friend? I who loved him as my most precious... friendship? Companion? MFEO? Or say 'Love With Dignity'?

I believe even that wealthy-faggot-boy also didn't have the strength to cut his head for his love to my best friend is far greater than me. I knew because I met him a day after the funeral. He cried heavily in his precious hall-like bedroom. That was the first time I ever got into his house. Sure do, he's the son of a wealthy family of jewelery empire business. He told me about how he missed my best friend until most of his speeches lost in his own suffocated breath. Such love and care he gave to him. All the time they spent together and watched him study (no wonder he survived for the exam. He studied with faggots too!). Such a clever way of surviving, my deceased best friend!

All along I met his friends (not my kind of friends); Those faggots and babes. They told me how he was the star of the night. Everybody loved him. Adored him. His charming appearance really brought up the value in him. Everyday he got someone. But he was so loyal to that wealthy-boy.

The thing is there was this one girl, a babe. A pretty babe kept hunting him. Not so sure who. But she came over every night to the club. Where there was him, there would be her. The girl kept giving him a not written 'I Love You Forever. Till Death Do Us Part'. As long as they could remember, the girl miraculously appeared out of nowhere. Sometimes she came alone with black one-piece, wearing dark eye shadow like The Crow or maybe came with a girl (kissing and hugging her as her loving couple) and let the girl send out the note. He said my best friend hardly could described her look as she came only during night-club scene.

I know now. Fate of love as I call it. Finished at first hand. It was Shelly. Two days after the funeral, medias brought out news about Shelly's death. Someone fucked her throat with a kitchen knife. Such a tragedy. Now I can never live by understanding the birds are flying free, the wind blows smoothing the air and the grass gets greener everyday. I keep seeing the dark-side of my life. Fuck the whole system of judiciaries. No one to blame for what had happened. No judgment to make anymore. They paid their own cost. As I paid mine. I killed Shelly. I killed her because she killed my love, my best friend.

BRUSH UP SKILL: DIGITAL COLORING 02


BASIC COLOR PATH (DIGITAL PHOTOSHOP)

BRUSH UP SKILL: DIGITAL COLORING 01

INKING (MANUAL)

SHADOW PATH (DIGITAL PHOTOSHOP)