"It's only through writing that I've ever been able to suppress life's personal disappointments. When I can't write I feel anxious and out of sorts and am easily riled, though I'm usually able to control my emotions..."
- Pramoedya Ananta Toer (The Mute's Soliloquy: A Memoir)
["Hanya dengan menulis aku mampu menekan segala kekecewaan peribadi hidup. Bila aku tidak menulis, aku merasa cemas & tidak keruan serta mudah gusar, walau selalunya aku bisa mengawal emosiku..."]

Thursday, September 16, 2010


Sebuah kisah pendek 6 m/s untuk terbitan Gempak Starz™. Ia mengisahkan seorang gadis yang sudah bertunang selama 3 tahun menjadikan sahabat tunangnya sebagai kekasih gelapnya yang dipanggil BUDDY. Apakah reaksi lelaki yang dipanggil BUDDY itu?

You look so fine,
Yet you are not so refine,
Since you told me to unwind,
When you call me your BUDDY.

You're such an emotional retard,
You stuck on someone you won't commit,
You bark for a lover you don't believe,
You cry of being hurt by someone...
Someone you only call a BUDDY.

is your partner in crime,
a friend to play your game,
a confident of your fragility,
a treat of your sexual appetite,
an ally of your seduction.

an amusement of your fairy tales,
an angel of your dream you assumed in reality,
another person lured into your net of spring,
another twinkling pleasure for pleasing moment,
entropy of someone you love more than just...

Love is not your BUDDY
for love is not a game you can play
once your heart is trap in the moment
than you crash and burn for a play
you know right away
that the game you play
is just a game for you

Love is not your BUDDY
because the truth is...
what you saw,
what you came for,
and what you conquer...
is just another wheel of your fate
what turns around comes around

To you who is now suffering for a BUDDY...
someone you fooled behind your lover
Someone instead of the person you call love
A betrayal for a lover so divine but...
I am just that fate you used to call BUDDY.

"I'm sorry, I did felt for you.. it was just a glitch. Yes! I did cry for you but in the end I felt like a fool. The moments you tried so hard to make me fall in love with you, it was amazing. You did it preciously! You quit your high-paid job so you don't have to fly away and be far distance from me, I was impressed yet I shouldn't be. You even ended your precious long-term relationship just to prove me your love is real. But then I realised, you used to call me your BUDDY when you were in the relationship. Now who will be your next BUDDY once I am your lover? So you see, in real love there is no such person you call BUDDY. So sorry if fate has made you turn back to emptiness, at least you know a lesson...


— Words from your BUDDY