"It's only through writing that I've ever been able to suppress life's personal disappointments. When I can't write I feel anxious and out of sorts and am easily riled, though I'm usually able to control my emotions..."
- Pramoedya Ananta Toer (The Mute's Soliloquy: A Memoir)
["Hanya dengan menulis aku mampu menekan segala kekecewaan peribadi hidup. Bila aku tidak menulis, aku merasa cemas & tidak keruan serta mudah gusar, walau selalunya aku bisa mengawal emosiku..."]

Tuesday, February 14, 2012


If today is the day Saint Valentine was recorded deceased in the Roman Calendar, than it's the same day I was recorded born. So if today is the day of so much love to Christianity, it is also a day of so much love for me as a Muslim. Like any other days, we may say why should we have a day to remind love when everyday we speak of love until at one point someone might puke their heart out for hearing too much of love. That's right, so that's why today I'll pick up what I might have threw up days before today & make a pre-mortem...

"In a pre-mortem, you sit down, think about what you want to happen, and imagine that your efforts failed. Then you figure out what you should have done differently to change the outcome."
— Gretchen Rubin (The Happiness Project)

This morning as I walked out to the LRT at Bandar Tasik Selatan, I saw an old Chinese lady carried burdens; each hand carried a plastic bag filled with heavy rags. While the size of the bag, almost half size of her body. From a distance I saw she stopped a while & put the bags down to take a deep breath before continued walking again with the burden. As I was close enough to her, I could see her sweat ran down her neck. I thought of helping her, but when she turned to the direction I didn't go so I walked on to my own path.

Yet, I was troubled by the thought I didn't took the effort to really help her. So I turned back and tried to find her, yet she was already nowhere to be found. Therefore I returned to my own path again just to find that she was already ahead of me! With her I saw a Malay policeman leading her way to the right waiting lane of her destination at the station. With that I just have to say God has other option to help her instead of me, just not my day to do good deed at that simple course.

Then in the train, I saw a middle aged Chinese lady was generous enough to give a seat to a Malay lady & her young daughter.

Maybe there's not much to celebrate for my 37th birthday but seeing the 2 lovely occasions with my own eyes, I just have to say that God has so much love for His humankind... indeed!

Today with so much love, I'm reminding myself that if next time I get a chance to help another person, no matter what race or faith they maybe, I don't want to hesitate or find an excuse... just go & help for I believe, that's the right course for me given by God after all those love I've excused days before. 

P.S: I Love You

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